Chapter 48: Growth

The world of shinobi was vast, so even if Kakuzu made a special trip here, it would take at least three to five days at the earliest. Having nothing better to do, Hakuki decided to wander around Godless Town. The Akatsuki, who had come here with the same purpose, would also have to wait several days. After settling the girl, their funds were completely depleted. Left with no other options, they set up a makeshift podium in Godless Town, hoping to recruit like-minded companions, and perhaps collect some donations to build a peaceful shinobi world.

“Old Dog, are there any other interesting places worth visiting in Godless Town?” Hakuki strolled leisurely down the empty street. In broad daylight, apart from a few drunkards lying about, there was hardly a soul in sight.

“Achoo—life in Godless Town only starts at night. At this hour, all the casinos are closed and the girls are asleep. There’s nowhere to go,” Yuba yawned, also wishing he could find a place to nap.

“Isn’t there anywhere special? Like, say, slave traders selling catgirl lolis?” Hakuki asked offhandedly.

“Bah! For that sort of thing, you’d have to go to the Lord’s capital! This place is too poor—who has money to buy slaves here? But, now that you mention it, there is a place that might be interesting,” Yuba suddenly remembered.

“Oh? Where?”

“Come on, follow me!”

…

“Good grief, even a cesspool wouldn’t smell this foul.” Hakuki rolled his eyes, nearly fainting.

This was nothing short of a landfill—a rotting landfill at that. No words in any language could capture how revolting it was. Even human corpses were casually tossed on the ground, teeming with maggots and rats scurrying in and out. Red-eyed crows circled, agitated by the visitors, cawing raucously in protest.

If not for their timely scavenging, this wretched place would have long succumbed to plague.

By comparison, the stench of feet in a tavern was a maiden’s paradise.

“It stinks, sure, but think—those eccentric geniuses are always a bit odd. Only someone with real skill would live here, don’t you think?” Yuba stuffed two wads of grass into his nostrils.

“If the person inside doesn’t satisfy me, this will be your grave. Saves me the trouble of disposing of your body,” Hakuki shuddered, rubbing his goosebumps away.

“Don’t worry, it’s definitely worth it!”

…

The strange little shack looked as though it had been assembled from construction debris, hideous and haphazard. Greenish-black smoke seeped from the roof, carrying a stench even fouler than decaying flesh—enough to drive away even the rats.

Before the two had even approached, a hunched, bald old man burst out. His face was covered in pustules, making him thoroughly unpleasant to look at. “Welcome, welcome, my guests! Are you in need of any medicine? I have everything you could possibly want!”

“A medicine vendor?” Hakuki was stunned. He was perfectly healthy in both body and mind—what need did he have for medicine?

“That’s right, a medicine vendor. Allow me to introduce him: Pharmacist Liao! He’s the best apothecary in the shinobi world—there’s no medicine he can’t make,” Yuba said proudly.

“Heh heh… You flatter me, really!” Liao’s face showed not a hint of modesty.

“But I truly don’t need any medicine. Goodbye.” Hakuki spread his hands; a few more minutes here and he really would need medicine for his sense of smell.

“Wait, wait, don’t go! If you’re ill, I can cure you. If you’re healthy, I can strengthen you—vitality, virility, you name it. I guarantee there’s something for you!” Liao was clearly desperate for money, entirely lacking the air of a master.

“If you really had such miraculous medicine, you’d have sold it to the Lord and made a fortune long ago. Why are you hiding out here?” Hakuki was utterly unconvinced.

“Don’t remind me. I once brewed a tonic for the Lord—an aphrodisiac. I may have gone a bit overboard; he plowed his fields for ten days and nights, until he was nothing but a dried husk, and ever since hasn’t had a shred of interest in women. That’s why I’m a wanted man, hiding in this dump…” Liao replied, his face full of misfortune.

“Goodbye!” Hakuki spun on his heel to leave.

“No, no, wait… I’ve just brewed a batch of Tiger Strikes Wolf—an extraordinary painkiller and anesthetic. Small doses over time can even enhance your genjutsu skills. I’ll sell it cheap! Dirt cheap!” Liao clung to Hakuki, unwilling to let him go.

Hakuki suddenly froze: “What did you say—Tiger Strikes Wolf?”

In the original story, this was the powerful analgesic Itachi used to suppress the pain from his illness and the side effects of the Mangekyō Sharingan. More importantly, its hallucinogenic effects allowed him to temporarily forget the agony of the Uchiha massacre.

(From Itachi’s True Legend)

But this medicine was highly addictive. The Tiger Swallow Clan, who invented it, used it to control powerful shinobi, which was morally condemned. Eventually, they were exterminated, and the drug’s recipe was lost. So… after defecting from the Leaf, Itachi must have come to Godless Town?

“Yes, yes, that very legendary Tiger Strikes Wolf! I can’t believe you know about it, little brother. You must be in the business as well…” Liao grinned slyly.

“Damn it! Don’t lump me in with you! In this life, the next, and every life after, I’d never touch that stuff!” Hakuki cursed furiously.

“Fine, fine, you don’t have to… no need to insult me,” Liao muttered, wiping spit from his face.

“But if you can brew that medicine, I’m starting to believe in your skills,” Hakuki mused, stroking his chin.

“Of course! So, what kind of medicine do you need? If you can name it, I can make it!” Liao was brimming with confidence.

“I…” Hakuki hesitated, glancing at Liao. “Forget it… The medicine I want, you probably can’t make…”

“Just say it! How will you know if I can’t unless you try?” Liao was about ready to explode with impatience.

“Can you make something to grow long hair? I doubt it—you’re bald yourself,” Hakuki pointed at Liao’s gleaming scalp.

“Well… well… you’re just making fun of me! Baldness is a terminal condition, there’s no cure,” Liao replied awkwardly, rubbing his head. He’d once been a handsome youth, but years of experimenting on himself had rendered him bald.

“Are you bald too? Is that a wig on your head?” Yuba tugged at Hakuki’s straight black hair.

“Get lost! My hair is real, just not thick enough. What I want is this,” Hakuki said, pulling out Jiraiya’s wanted poster and pointing at his lush, flowing hair.

In truth, he wanted Madara Uchiha’s magnificent mane, but having no photo of Madara, Jiraiya’s would suffice.

“You should have said so earlier! Going from zero to one is hard, but from one to a hundred is easy! I actually have just the thing—an instant hair-growth tonic, ready to go!” Liao dove into his ramshackle hut, rummaging through boxes and cabinets.

Soon he emerged with a sticky, jet-black paste in a liquor bottle.

“Does it really work?” Hakuki sniffed it; the scent was herbal and not unpleasant.

“I’ll show you!” Liao grabbed a rat, smeared the paste on its back, and within minutes, its fur was sprouting wildly—it was nearly a porcupine.

“By the gods… with this stuff, you could open a barbershop in the capital and make a killing!” Hakuki exclaimed.

“Heh heh… Thank you for your patronage. One million ryo! All rare and precious ingredients, plus research costs—I’m barely making anything,” Liao said, rubbing his hands together.

“Damn, that’s highway robbery—more expensive than theft…” Hakuki grimaced, but paid up anyway. A real man doesn’t haggle.

“Heh heh… I haven’t had a customer in three years! Next time I’ll brew you a batch of virility tonics!” Liao grinned broadly, already dreaming of buying new ingredients.

“Let’s hope I never need to come back.”

“Only apply it to your hair, all right? Don’t try it on any… strange places!”