Chapter 24: Has Your Mind Been Stuck in Your Rear End?

Dongfang Mo pulled his wife into his arms and barked, "What are you standing there for? Go find your cousin! No, wait—find a doctor first!"

Dongfang Mo carried Zhao Susu to the bedroom and laid her down.

When Zhao Susu came to, she wept softly at the bedside. "Feng'er has never traveled far from home; why would she suddenly run off? It’s complete madness! If any harm comes to her, how could I ever face my brother and sister-in-law..."

Dongfang Mo patted her back, offering hurried comfort. "I have already sent a gyrfalcon with a letter to Jiebai. He will surely intercept her along the way. Feng'er will be fine, have no fear."

"Wuwuwu, how can I not worry?" Zhao Susu continued to sob, reaching out to strike Dongfang Mo a few times.

Meanwhile, Zhao Qiaofeng was already a hundred miles outside the capital. She dismounted her horse, checking the map Dongfang Jiebai had left for her from time to time. She was dressed in men's short-sleeved attire, her face smeared with soot, and she had even disguised her voice.

"This direction should be correct."

She had never traveled far before, but every time Dongfang Jiebai returned home, he would regale her with tales of the borderlands and the battlefield. Now, she refused to sit in the capital waiting for her cousin to be rescued; she wanted to go and help him.

Dongfang Jiebai knew nothing of what had transpired in the capital. It was five days before he received the letter.

Inside the military camp, the tent was brightly lit. The vice generals had gathered for their first formal meeting. Split into two factions, they argued until their faces were flushed; despite being of the same lineage, they were now bickering like sworn enemies.

"If you ask me, we should strike directly and drive these Northern Di bastards back to their desert!" Vice General Sun slammed his hand on the table, his voice booming like a bell.

Vice General Gao sneered, "That’s easy for you to say, Vice General Sun. The Northern Di are master cavalrymen; they move like the wind. What are we supposed to chase them with? These two legs of yours?"

Ji Ci crouched on the table in front of Dongfang Jiebai, her little head turning back and forth. She stared at whoever was speaking, looking for all the world like someone watching a show. As soon as Vice General Gao finished, she immediately turned to glare at Vice General Sun, her tail tip tapping the desk with agitation—

*‘Your turn! Go on, snap back at him!’*

Dongfang Jiebai pressed down on her restless head, his fingertips subtly shielding her overly expressive eyes, lest her human-like behavior reveal something unusual.

"Vice General Gao is just inflating the enemy's ego and extinguishing our own morale. I think Vice General Sun is right—we should strike directly and wipe out the Northern Di," another vice general chimed in.

The two sides began arguing again. At this moment, Dong Ming stood up and raised a hand to silence them. "Why not use the General as bait? The Northern Di hate the General to the bone; they will surely pursue him with everything they have."

Ji Ci’s ears instantly pricked up, her fur bristling as she jumped up.

*‘Did you sit on your brains? You want to use the commander-in-chief as bait? They already hate your general enough to grind his bones, and you want to offer him up as bait? You’re truly a filial son to your father—you’re going to be the death of him!’*

Dongfang Jiebai’s brow twitched. This little fox certainly had a colorful way of hurling insults.

"Absurd!" Vice General Sun shouted in opposition. "The General holds a vital position! How can he take such a risk?"

Ji Ci nodded in agreement. *‘Exactly! If anything happens to Dongfang Jiebai, I’m finished too!’*

The man’s gaze darkened. Could their lives truly be linked? If so, he had to protect himself even more carefully.

"What does the General think?" Dong Ming interrupted his thoughts. "Shall we continue to endure the Northern Di cavalry harassing our borders, or shall we strike and send them back to their ancestral home?"

Dongfang Jiebai’s finger traced a spot on the map. "If I lure them into the Narrow Pass... and you lie in ambush on the mountains, would that one strike not set the Northern Di back for three years of recovery?"

Dong Ming’s eyes flickered. *Heaven above, isn't this practically begging for death?* His lips curled into a frantic smile; that fatal terrain was exactly the burial ground the Grand Princess had arranged! Suppressing his wild joy, he declared loudly, "The General is brilliant!"

Ji Ci leaned toward the map. Though she didn't fully grasp the tactics, she could recognize the shape of the mountains. *‘No, no! If someone tries to kill you there, it would be as easy as slaughtering a chick.’* Ji Ci shook her head, disagreeing with the plan.

Seeing the little fox shaking its head, Dong Ming’s eyes flashed with malevolence. A dignified great general, discussing matters of state while keeping a wild fox—it was truly a distraction from duty.

Dongfang Jiebai looked at the group and made his final decision. "Five thousand elite troops will follow me to lure the enemy."

"Vice General Sun, take ten thousand men to ambush the mountain ridge. Vice General Dong, take five hundred light cavalry to harass the enemy and draw them toward our position."

With the arrangements made, Dongfang Jiebai dismissed the group. Ji Ci scurried frantically across the table, gesturing at falling rocks, playing dead, and finally lying on her back, twitching. *‘If you go there, the rocks will come crashing down, and you’ll be smashed into a meat paste that they’ll have to scrape off the ground!’* Ji Ci performed with such earnest, vivid detail that it would have been a waste not to join a circus.

Dongfang Jiebai grabbed her by the fur on the back of her neck. "I’m taking you with me."

Ji Ci stopped struggling, her little head spinning. He was taking her? To live together, and to die together?

Three days later, deep in the night, the deployment was complete. Black armor reflected the cold moon; long spears cut through the northern wind. Dongfang Jiebai wore his battle armor, which shimmered with a cold, glowing light in the darkness.

He gripped his long spear—his signature weapon. It was his greatest strength; where his spear struck, nothing survived. Dongfang Jiebai tucked Ji Ci into a cloth pouch on his chest, leaving only her fuzzy head exposed.

"Be good. Don't run around, or you might get trampled by the horses," Dongfang Jiebai said, stroking her little head with a gentle voice.

Ji Ci nodded, her little head bobbing in a cute fashion.

"General, please be careful in this battle," Vice General Sun said, riding forward with a worried expression.

"Proceed according to the plan."

Dong Ming’s five hundred light cavalry had already moved out. In the distance, flames erupted, and the sounds of war cries tore through the night. Dongfang Jiebai dug his heels into his horse’s flanks and charged into the enemy formation, his spear thrusting like a dragon.

Arrows whistled through the air. He leaned to the side, dodging them, and backhanded three enemy riders from their mounts. The sounds of slaughter intensified.

Someone shouted, "A reward of a thousand gold pieces to whoever kills Dongfang Jiebai!"

The Northern Di barbarians went mad, swarming to surround Dongfang Jiebai. He spurred his horse toward the Narrow Pass. He had already commanded his five thousand men not to follow him onto the battlefield, only to prioritize their own survival. If the enemy pursued, they were to retreat to the main camp. On the battlefield, Dongfang Jiebai’s word was law; no one dared to defy it.

The Northern Di army watched Dongfang Jiebai, licking their lips in excitement. "Capture Dongfang Jiebai alive and bring him back to the royal court!"

A line of cavalry followed closely behind him. Ji Ci’s tiny claws dug tightly into the seams of his armor, terrified of being shaken off.

"Don't be afraid."

Dongfang Jiebai continued to spur the horse, and the steed galloped forward. Ji Ci’s little claws slowly crept downward until they touched the horse's back, and she secretly channeled her vitality into the warhorse. The horse's speed surged, leaving the Northern Di riders behind.

Dongfang Jiebai’s lips curled up slightly. The little thing was secretly helping him; what a thoughtful little fox. Ji Ci remained unaware that her actions were entirely visible to Dongfang Jiebai.